Is An Eye An Eye?

Recently, my husband and I were driving over the bridge when I saw what quite possibly may have been the biggest seagull in existence, which brought about the following conversation, and the question – is an eye an eye?

Me: “Holy . . .”

Husband: “What?”

Me: “That.” Pointing. “That’s the biggest seagull I’ve ever seen. I thought it was a pelican at first.”

Husband: “It’s not that . . . wait. Did you say seagull?”

Me: “Yes!”

Husband: “There’s no way that was a seagull.”

Me: “Don’t wreck the car over it.” Because now he’s looking in the rearview trying to get another glimpse. “But that was totally a seagull.”

Husband: “That was way too big to be a seagull.”

Me: “But it was. That’s the kind you have to protect your eyes from.”

Husband: “You don’t have to protect your eyes from a bird.”

Me: Looking at him in disbelief. “You’re kidding, right?”

Husband: “No.”

Me: “But you are.”

Husband: “But I’m not.”

Me: “Have you never seen the movie The Birds?”

Husband: “That’s a movie.”

Me: “Doesn’t mean it’s not based on fact.”

Husband: “But it’s not.”

Me: “How can you say that? Have I taught you nothing? Of course, you have to watch your eyes around birds.”

Husband: “Birds don’t eat eyes.”

Me: “What about vultures?”

Husband: “That’s different. Other birds don’t do that sort of thing.”

Me: “Seriously? What about crows?”

Husband: “Crows don’t eat meat.”

Me: “Crows eat meat. Crows totally eat meat. Unless the individual crow is a vegetarian. But crows are carrion feeders.”

Husband: Looks at me and decides not to argue because I know these things.

Me: Smirks because I know these things.

Husband: “But we’re not talking about crows. We’re talking about seagulls. And they don’t eat eyes.”

Me: “They eat fish eyes.”

Husband: “But that’s different.”

Me: “How?”

Husband: “Because it is.”

Me: “An eye is an eye.”

Husband: “An eye isn’t an eye.”

Me: “I’m pretty sure that it is. By its very definition, an eye is an eye.”

Husband: “There’s too much traffic, I have to concentrate.”

Me: “Fine. But if that thing’s around when we get out of the car, I’m protecting my eyes. One of us has to be able to see to drive home.”

Husband: “Hmph.”

This is a picture I took of a different seagull, but seriously – would you trust this bird? Look at that beak!

At that point, I almost hoped the world’s largest seagull would follow us to the parking lot so I could see if my husband would protect his eyes or not, but, unfortunately, it didn’t.

AND my husband still claims that worrying about birds going after your eyes is an irrational fear. I shall call his people Team Foolishly Trust The Birds.

My people shall be called Team Hitchcock (it has a better ring to it than Team DuMaurier and to be honest this is one of the instances where the movie was better than the story).

Which team are you?

Book Review – The Girls Save The World In This One by Ash Parsons

I totally chose this one for it’s title! 🙂 It’s not the kind of book you read if you’re looking for beautiful prose. You shouldn’t choose this one if you’re looking for deep literary insight. And if you want a very factual, true to life tale, this isn’t for you.

But if you’re looking for a fast paced, funny good time, this book is it!

Three friends attend ZombieCon only to have – you may have guessed it – the Zombie Apocalypse break out at the conference. While fighting for their lives (and the lives of others) these BFFs discover the strength, ingenuity and self-confidence they need to survive. Big on girl power, friendship, and self discovery, with a bit of romance on the side, this book is a perfect, lighthearted summer read!

From Goodreads: June’s whole life has been leading up to this: ZombieCon, the fan convention celebrating all things zombies. She and her two best friends plan on hitting all the panels, photo ops, and meeting the heartthrob lead of their favorite zombie apocalypse show Human Wasteland.

And when they arrive everything seems perfect, though June has to shrug off some weirdness from other fans–people shambling a little too much, and someone actually biting a cast member. Then all hell breaks loose and June and her friends discover the truth: real zombies are taking over the con. Now June must do whatever it takes to survive a horde of actual brain-eating zombies–and save the world. This is a hilarious and heartfelt horror comedy, an ode to zombies, friendship, and girl power that readers are going to love. 

Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me? by Mindy Kaling ~ Nonfiction Humor Book Review

wpb20This book is cute. And funny. And after reading it, it’s apparent that Mindy Kaling is the cute, funny friend that everyone wants, so they probably aren’t hanging out without her.

Kaling briefly chronicles her childhood as well as her struggle to start her career and her slow rise to fame. She then shares her opinions on certain subjects. The book is written in a familiar tone, inviting the reader into Mindy’s ‘inner circle’ and making them feel like a friend.

If you’re looking for a cheeky book that will make you laugh, give this one a try. If you’re looking for something with depth, this book will probably leave you underwhelmed. I personally enjoyed it and reading it made me smile. For that I give it 5 stars.

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